All day today I kept thinking about what happened the last full day of Amy's life.
It was a Sunday. We had our own worship service in Amy's bedroom. We sang songs, shared some Scripture, sang some more and talked about heaven. Amy was so weak, she wasn't able to smile anymore but her eyes told us she enjoyed it. We had a few friends visit, and before bed we let Amy finish watching a movie that she started the night before that I had given to her for her birthday. We all watched it with her and I don't think I will ever watch it again. It will bring too much pain. ( We Bought A Zoo)
If we had known it was to be her last night on earth, would we have done something different?
I assumed she had a few days left. My oldest said she felt the time was near. My daughters and I stayed down in her bedroom that night taking turns being in bed with her. She didn't sleep that I know of. I quietly prayed, sang with her, talked about heaven and tried to keep the tears away, when I was with her. It was easier when I had to be strong for her than it is now.
The next day, as I have written before, Amy's soul left her body around noon.
Tomorrow is Sunday. We plan on going to Sunday School and Church. I would like to stay home and hide but I know I must not. How can I ever get through the morning, knowing that about the time the service is ending, is when I held my sweet Amy for the last time?
I know that God will give me strength and comfort, but I am afraid.
Will the 8th of each month always bring me pain?
2 Corinthians 1:3-5