Tomorrow will be seven months since Amy went to live in heaven.
My mom just sent me this email. She is 83 years young and always types in capital letters. She is amazing that she is able to understand her computer and be able to communicate with her daughters and her friends like she does. Here is what she said:
"I WANT TO SHARE WITH YOU ABOUT WHAT I FELT THE LORD WAS SHARING WITH ME, THE OTHER NIGHT WHEN I COULD NOT GET TO SLEEP. I HOPE I CAN PUT IT IN THE RIGHT WORDS.
THE LORD BROUGHT AMY HOME TO BE WITH HIM AS A BLESSING TO HER. FOR NOW SHE CAN DO ALL THE THINGS WHEN SHE WAS EARTH BOUND SHE COULD NOT DO. ALSO THAT HE, IN DOING SO, GAVE YOU A BLESSING TOO. FOR NOW YOU ARE ALSO FREE TO BE ABOUT DOING OTHER THINGS FOR HIM. I HOPE I HAVE PUT IT IN THE RIGHT WORDS....IT JUST CAME SO CLEAR TO ME, THAT IN BRINGING AMY HOME, HE WAS GIVING BOTH OF YOU HIS BLESSINGS."
I love my mama so much for being able to tell me this. I have been feeling what she voiced lately, but yet I feel guilty for even thinking that Amy's death was a blessing.
For thirty-three years I have been a mother and that has been my occupation. I also added wife, homeschool mom of three, secretary for our home business, and of course cook, maid, and nurse to my occupation. But overall I was mother and caretaker of Amy. That's all I've know for that last thirty-one years.
Now, my time is mostly my own.
I've had knee surgery and have healed well from that.
I'm still trying to heal from my heart surgery.
I'm trying to lean on the Lord for wisdom in directing my life.
I have not been involved in any church ministry for the last 7 months but God clearly told me about two months ago to tell our church about Compassion International.
So three weeks ago I got up in front of the church and explained about our two children we sponsor and how others could sponsor a child also.
I felt good about doing this. I knew that God wanted me to do it and I knew that Amy would have been proud of her mom for sharing about the needy and poor. Because of her, I had the courage to share with others. And because of Amy 9 more children got sponsors and will not be suffering anymore from hunger or lack of education. Most important, these children and their families will hear the good news of Jesus.
He is what makes all the difference in a person's life. In my life and in Amy's. Because of Him, I know I will see my precious daughter again and we will have eternity to share together.
So tomorrow...... I will try to get through my day as I always do. I'm sure there will be tears and pain, but there will be hope also. Because of Jesus.